Amy Chua's "Battle Hymn of a Tiger Mom"

Just got through watching Tavis Smiley's interview with author and Yale professor Amy Chua, who wrote the controversial book regarding Asian-American parents' infamous parenting tactics. Chua admits that she is the product of crazy-strict Chinese immigrant parents. Subsequently, she became a tough parent. Her daughters underwent rigorous musical and academic schedules. She argues that she--and her kids--were better for it.

Chua doesn't claim to know all of the answers. Her book, she contends, is not a parenting guide. At the same time, Chua stands by her convictions, even though her youngest daughter chafed against their iron-fisted family life. Chua points to that very experience as her reason for penning "Battle Hymn of a Tiger Mom." By all accounts, she receives conflicting feedback on the book. Lots of American parents consider her an abusive monster. Yet, she gets letters from, say, Nigerians who jokingly comment "Oh my gosh, my parents were the same way!"

Like Chua, I'm a product of immigrant parents. My upbringing was different...but I'm not sure I would call it strict or oppressive. More than anything, it's comical when I look back at it. There was just a certain standard, a way of doing things that is very characteristic of Caribbean families. I guess a part of it had to do with a "kids should be seen and not heard" mentality. There was a kid's place and I just knew to stay in it or else. I was mischievous; but never wicked and lawless.

I believe, as Chua does, that immigrant parents are often no-nonsense, stern disciplinarians. A girlfriend of mine keeps me in stitches when she mocks her Haitian mom. However, I also know plenty of American, particularly, African-American parents who "don't play that," if you will. I'm thinking of my buddy, LJ. His stern American mom is the reason he turned out to be an extraordinary man.

Anyhow, I agree with Chua. Immigrant parents are...well...mission-minded and their parenting reflects that. They traveled far. They seek to go far, I suppose. And it all comes from love. Tough, tough love. But they have to pull back and listen to their children.

I definitely parent through the lens of my black Nicaraguan upbringing. At the same time, I realize that I need a happy medium in order to relate to Selena's world. I suppose what's needed is a hybrid between old-world/new-world parenting.

What do you think? How will/do you parent your kids? And can you find yourself picking up Amy Chua's bestseller?